A Pregnancy Poem

Mar 3, 2014

A special thanks to Dr. Marc Kalan for this original and “humorous” contribution…..

˜Twas the night before pregnancy test, and all through the home,

Medications were readied, including good ol’ progesterone.

Pills were lined up on the kitchen table with care,

In hopes that they supported a tiny pregnancy in there.


The patients then snuggled all warm in their bed

With visions of parenthood swimming through their head

Papa said to mama “should we sneak a test tonight”?

Mamma said “are you crazy? I can’t stand the fright”


Resigned to wait just a few hours more,

Papa fell asleep, you could tell from the snore

Mama lie awake, hoping and dreaming

When the nesting instinct struck and she started some cleaning


Between scrubbing, wiping and rearranging the kitchen again,

A peculiar sound grabbed mamma’s attention

A flutter, a flapping, wings beating could it bee

Astonished she peered into the yard at a tree


Perched in the branches comfortable and serene

A stork looked back at mamma, what could this mean?

A joke or a jest? “is someone messing with me?”

Mamma rubbed her eyes and blinked, yet could not change what she see


And then things got stranger, as if the night weren’t weird enough

The stork lifted a small package wrapped in a blanketed tuft

For what seemed a long time, mamma starred at that bird

Because storks should bring babies, at least that’s what she heard


The stork just looked back, and although it did not speak,

Mamma cold swear that she heard something quieter than a squeak

“You want this so bad, on your face I can read it”

Tomorrow will be a good day so go to sleep, you’re going to need it!


With that the bird took flight and mamma rushed back to bed

Amazingly she was asleep before the pillow hit her head

The next morning she awoke, was it a dream, could she know?

But she didn’t have time to wait, cause papa was in the car and ready to go


Out of the driveway, onto the freeway with a swoosh,

Careful the bumps! Jeez this progesterone hurts my tush!

Into the parking lot and up to the third floor by memory

To the bathroom with you, we need some pee pee


The nurse takes the urine, pulls 4 drops to test

Mamma’s barely holding it together, papa’s a total mess

One pink line appears, then slowly at first

Another emerges, “it is positive” says the nurse


At first there is denial, and then come the tears

Can this really be happening after so many years?

But it can and it is, you will be a mother

You will get there one day, one way or another